Preparing to Die – Priorities, the Pandemic, and the election

Okay, so I know I said it all won’t be sad and I promise it won’t. I know you don’t believe me with that title, but please, stick with me. First of all, I don’t have anything new to bring to this table. Many have said these same thoughts, quite certainly more eloquently than myself. I just wanted to bring light to thoughts I felt like needed to be brightened – talk about the hard parts – and encourage you to shift your focus.

My heart has been very heavy today. We got news this morning that a friend had passed away. He had children our kids’ ages. It caused me to reflect on all the friends we have lost in the past three years since I have had cancer. Moms, dads, teenage children, toddlers, grandfathers, grandmothers. Some of these were cancer but most of them were sudden, unexpected deaths. As my random thoughts seem to do, they seemed to solidify this morning into a realization that having cancer is a gift in many ways – one of those is that it often gives you a chance to prepare to die. Most of these friends were not given that heads up – our friend this morning certainly wasn’t, and neither was his family. Now as Marsh would say, being ever the simplistic realist, we are all dying. And he’s right. We are, but we usually don’t live that way. We assume we have years and years ahead of us. We push to the back of our minds that we aren’t promised another second on this earth. There was a time in my life I internally rolled my eyes when I heard those words from the pulpit. And even now, I don’t think this is something we should be acutely focused on at all times – we don’t need to live in fear or despair. And by all means, I pray that the Lord keeps me here to a ripe old age. I want to watch all of my kids get married. I want to be a grandma. But I also know that the odds aren’t in my favor. As we have seen, God can most certainly defy the odds – He has for me twice now. I also know that every day we wake up is another day that someone is making progress in cancer research. I am hopeful that we will see more cures for cancer in my lifetime. Either way, having cancer, and certainly having it twice, has made me have more of this “preparing to die” mindset, it is always in the back of my mind and many times moves to the front of the line of my thoughts. My priorities are different than they used to be. I am trying to focus more on what’s important. I am trying to be more intentional. Many days I feel like I am in a race against the clock to finish all the things I want to before I leave this earth. I want to make sure I’ve done what I feel like is most important for those I love, and others for whom I could have an impact on.

It is a crazy time in our world right now. There is so much hate, divisiveness, cruelty, slander, murder and worse that we seem to be bombarded with every day. We are heading into an election that, at least for my generation, is like none we have ever seen. So much time is being spent slinging the proverbial mud and vehemently criticising the opposition – no matter if the topic is politics, social justice, or just pick the social media viral topic of the day. While I do have strong opinions about many of these things, I don’t want to contribute to the vitriol that I see daily. My time is limited, and yours is too. The kicker is that we just don’t know how much time it is limited to. We need to be judicious of how we spend our time. We need to choose our words carefully. Have strong opinions, stand up for your convictions, but please, do this always in a spirit of love. If you aren’t showing the fruit of the spirit in how you discuss these matters, then you need to put your hand over your mouth, or tie your hands behind your back may be more like it these days. We need to spend more time lifting one another up instead of tearing down people we don’t know or ideas we aren’t fully informed about. Consider others above yourself in how you approach Pandemic issues, Political issues, or social issues these days. Don’t pass up the opportunity to tell a mamma that she is doing a great job – trust me, she needs to hear it. Tell that hard working dad that you admire his dedication to his family – he needs to hear it. Tell that kid that he is loved, cared about, and that you are proud of him – he needs to hear it. Tell your friend how much you appreciate them – they need to hear it. Remember someone’s birthday and gush on them – make them feel special. Send someone a surprise gift for no reason. I truly believe that if we spent more of our time being intentional on these things the world would be a better place. We could have some social climate change. Yes, we can make a difference in elections by voting, helping campaigns, etc. – and we should take that right seriously – it is a big deal. BUT, we can make a bigger impact on an individual’s life than we ever can in the vast land of confusion and calamity that is our society these days. Let’s shift our focus to be more intentional with the people in our lives. Pour into them. Make them feel loved and appreciated. You may not have much time left, so use that time wisely. Tell people to their face the good things you think about them or say to others about them.

I am so incredibly thankful that I did normal mom things today. I ran errands, picked up groceries, went through the drive thru at Chick Fil A (yes, if I am out and about there is a pretty good chance I will end up there, Costco, or Starbucks), and am back home waiting on my big guys to get in from hunting. I am thankful that I was able to clean my own house this week. I am thankful that I am able to plan a trick-or-treat party for Gus tomorrow (just family – we are letting him trick-or-treat our house). But even though I am back to going through the same types of mundane tasks I’ve been doing for 17 years now, I will always have that nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I need to be preparing to die. I want to make sure that I have taught my boys to value what is truly important in life. I want to make sure they know where to look to make wise decisions – who their heroes should be. I want to make sure they know they are loved and appreciated. And above all, I want them to know that I love Jesus and desire nothing more than for them to do the same. Like the old hymn says “Let Others See Jesus in You.” Make this your focus in this incredibly mercurial time in our country. Because friends, this is the most important issue – the one with most life changing potential on the ballot right now.