July 18, 2021 · from Lesley’s original CaringBridge journal
Well, I have been super busy the last few weeks enjoying my healing and getting back to “normal” body. I’ve still been taking it easy but the restrictions were lifted a little. On Monday, (7/12) Marsh and I celebrated our 18th anniversary. I spent the day driving clear across the state to buy a pitching machine for the boys. It was a steal of a deal and it is going to keep Marsh from having to have Tommy John surgery from throwing BP for the boys! The only downside is now I have no excuse when they need someone to throw with them. I should have thought that through a little more…. ANYwho, Wednesday came along and I drove to North Atlanta for my six-week post-op visit with my surgeon. I got into some yucky traffic, I was a tad late, but I was still in and out of my appointment in 30 minutes and was back home in time to fix supper. My surgeon said everything was looking great, but that skin on my left side was still super thin and an area of concern for her. She said that she was afraid if I did something like fall and brace myself with that arm, that it would pop right open. She wanted to keep it taped up and have me take it easy on that side for another six weeks. I was a tad bummed that I wasn’t going to be cleared for the pool, but really, no big deal. I was experimenting with a new recipe that night and it was so good – I ate too much (something I would later regret for reasons you will hear in just a bit). I got Gus bathed and was starting to take my own shower so I could lie down with him and read books. This is when all the fun started.
Without being too revealing or getting flagged for inappropriate content, I will keep details to a minimum, even though that is hard for me. I noticed a slightly damp spot on my newly taped incision. I looked in the mirror and it looked like a small circular area I hadn’t noticed before. I felt it again. It was slightly moist, but almost indiscernibly so. It felt slightly depressed and I was thinking, “well dang, this is what she was talking about!” I had not gotten in the shower yet, so I got my phone, took a couple of pictures of it and texted it to my surgeon. I hopped in the shower, pretty much knowing the chain of events that this was setting off but not really letting myself process it or focus on it yet – I was in logistics mode. By the time I got out of my very quick shower (because I didn’t want to delay things and I also didn’t want that area getting too wet) my surgeon had texted several times, called, and texted another very urgent message for me to call her back. She agreed that that was what had happened and I needed to head back to Atlanta right then – I was having surgery that night. I called Marsh into the bathroom, told him what was going on, and started telling him what things to put in my bag. I called my sweet friend Kellie and she was on her way to my house. We were in the car in about 5 minutes and passed her on the way.
We checked into the hospital at 10PM and went straight to my room (this is getting too familiar of a routine). We sped through all the paperwork, questions, and more and got my IV going. I ended up getting bumped for an emergency and had surgery at 3 AM. This was an experience I haven’t had yet. The hospital was like a ghost town at this hour – so different from all the other times I’ve had surgery. What she decided to do was to swap out the implant on that side to take some of the tension off, close me back up, and “keep our fingers crossed.” I ate my breakfast, passed all my post-op requirements and was out of there before noon. I had my customary post-op Chick-Fil-A meal on the way home and was lounging in my chair by 2 PM on Friday.
If this does not hold, then we will end up doing the flap procedure I’ve been trying to avoid. That is okay though because as much as I have dreaded the thought of that, I don’t want to keep hitting the reset button on my recovery. If it turns out that is what we end up doing, then I know this was still worth it because God knew I would need this to convince myself it was the right decision. We tried. Obviously I am a little frustrated because in many ways I am back at square one and the last six weeks of being careful seem like a waste – but I can’t let my mind go there. Again, so many generous gestures by friends and family have ministered in our lives and I have seen major growth through yet another surgery and trial. God is using all of this and none of it is a waste! I mean, at the drop of a hat a friend left her family and spent the night in my house with my crazy crew. Do you not think that is bringing us closer? My sister-in-law came over Friday evening and spent the weekend with us to help me out (she is a great caregiver!). And the world’s best Mother in law will be here tomorrow (why she decided to plan a beach trip while I was going to have an emergency is beyond me but I’ll forgive her).
I have an amazing community of caregivers. I have the best group of doctors. I am so loved and taken care of. We will get through this next hurdle. The boys are enjoying getting to boss me around some more – lots of “mom! put your arm down! don’t pick that up” going on around here 😉 This week is going to be a logistical nightmare. I have multiple appointments every day – three of those in Augusta. We have been working on that this weekend so as to not be as stressed this upcoming week. I’ve already had some volunteers for supper a night or two. And again, God knowing what I need before I do – I bought an inordinate amount of groceries this past week – enough for about 15 or more meals. I also had all my office work for the farm done already (since the deadline for most bills/tax returns was Friday). See! He relived some stress in advance!
I told a friend when she asked why I wanted to go misbehaving like this that I just like feeling special and being treated like a princess I guess 🙂 In all seriousness though, I have not been very down at all. In fact, my blood pressure was the best it has ever been while we were getting me prepped for surgery, and that was not medicated! God is in control. I have nothing to fear. I do have things you can pray for though, so here goes:
- my eye – it is still dealing me fits – we need this to stop – I’m going to be dipping into the kids’ savings soon to buy artificial tears – I am going through an ungodly amount! (insider tip – buy stock in Refresh, I am single-handedly going to cause a shortage and prices to go up)
- healing from surgery – if it is going to bust loose again, that it do it sooner rather than later
- my skin – it is still healing, but slowly
- my lymphedema – my arm is still swelling awfully and insurance won’t cover the pump I need to help it
- logistics – that things flow smoothly as we rearrange for me not driving again for a while
- my men – so much falls on them. I know God is working in their lives too, just pray that they are able to see it that way and grow from this experience
Love to you all,
Lesley
Comments from CaringBridge
Joy Watts — 7/19/21
Lesley, your continued trust and rest in the Lord’s sovereignty & care is such an INCREDIBLE testimony to everyone! You will have eternal rewards, blessings, and LOTS of jewels in your crown! We pray for you everyday. Much love! (James 1:12, Psalm 27:5, Psalm 31:13-14)
Nancy Sullivan — 7/19/21
Bless your heart, we do say this a lot in the south, but I really mean it! God is in control, but we so often want to take the wheel. Prayers continue, dear Leslie.
Dawn Cannon — 7/18/21
Hi! Will be asking God to completely heal every part of you! What a lot to walk through! I am amazed by your cheerfulness! May God continue to strengthen you and encourage you!
Cancermamma 