May 14, 2020 · from Lesley’s original CaringBridge journal
Several years after Jack and Eli were born when I was coming out of the fog of having three children under two, I began to feel like I wanted just one more baby. Marsh was not so convinced. We spent what felt like ages going back and forth on how we felt, never landing on the same page at the same time until 2014. I was expecting that last baby. And then we lost that baby. And then I had to have major surgery and was told I would have to wait at least a year to try again. We were not sure if we could or should try again. I was devastated and heartbroken. Admittedly I thought that it felt like God was playing a cruel joke on me. And then along came Gus on May 16, 2017 – the day his oldest brother turned 12 – Murphy had a birthday twin. He was a high risk pregnancy and had some kidney issues prior to birth which were soft markers for a laundry list of major medical conditions. He had none of them. I know nothing of what our other child would have been like, though I look forward to meeting him again someday, but Gus was the perfect completion of our family. Even with my breast cancer diagnosis when he was 6-7 months old, he was the perfect medicine for all of us. God knew what He was doing and his timing and plan were perfect. Sweet May 16, my bookends’ birthday 🙂
God’s plan and timing is perfect right now too. Don’t get me wrong, the words “I’m scared” and “I don’t want to die” have come out of my mouth many times in the past month along with plenty of tears from my eyes. But I know that God’s plans are to prosper me, not to harm me, and I MUST rest in that the best that I can. This donor of mine…I still keep thinking that she got a call in the middle of a global pandemic, says “sure, I’ll do it” and goes right in the middle of all of this mess for a woman she knows nothing about. God prepared her heart and her body for this. Stem cell collection day was Tuesday. She finished her week of shots and went to the hospital for them to collect. The goal is to collect at least 5 million stem cells for the transplant. I was told that sometimes they get 1-3 extra and can save that for a booster dose for later in case I need it, so that is what we prayed for – boldly, that we would get what we needed and a little extra. They collected 16 million stem cells. That was not a type-o. Sixteen. One-Six. Friends! That is over three times what we need!!! We will obviously have plenty for my transplant and they will store the rest for me if I ever need it. My transplant coordinator said this girl must be an overachiever like me 😉
Time after time, especially in the past five years with my multiple hospitalizations, surgeries, cancers, I have seen God take what on the surface to be a horrible tragedy and not just grow me through it but bless me and my family tremendously in the process. I am seeing it now. I hope and pray that this is yet another one of those circumstances and will only strengthen and beautify the testimony of what He has done in my life and that I will have many years ahead to share it with others. Since we found out yesterday about the collection amount I can’t help but keep chuckling about it. I was hoping for maybe 8 and I got 16. Sweet 16. I want to say I am amazed, and I am, I truly am, but at the same time I just want to smile a knowing smile – THIS is our God! Why should I be surprised?
(For those that like to nerd out about my numbers with me, I did get them written down from Tuesday. My WBC was 3.1, Hgb 11.8, ANC 2.3, and platelets 321 😊)
Comments from CaringBridge
Elizabeth Long — 5/17/20
Awesome! I love your journals! Tears were streaming down my face also as i was reading! God is so good & loves us so much more than we can ever imagine! Continuing to pray for you & your precious family! ❤💕😍
Laura Brodmann — 5/15/20
Tears are streaming as I read and write this! Praising God for such great news and marveling at how HE is in the smallest of details in the biggest of ways! Hugs to you! 😘
Krista Shook — 5/15/20
I don’t always sign in but today I had too – 16 million! Praise to the almighty God who sits on the throne and holds Lesley in the palm of His hands!
Wishing Murphy and Gus an early Happy Birthday as I assume you’ll be busy celebrating tomorrow :o)
Honor and glory to our God, sweet Lord Jesus, and the Holy Ghost!
Martha Lee — 5/15/20
Lesley, I only know you through FB when a post was shared from Pam Cook. I have been praying and watching for your updates. I am crying tears of joy and celebrating with you about “sweet 16”. Our God is an on time God. Continuing prayers for you and your family.
Gina Shealy — 5/15/20
God is really showing off! Praise the Lord! He is faithful!!
Nancy Sullivan — 5/15/20
Wonderful news! God is so good!!
Emily Johnson — 5/15/20
Great great News ❤️
Donna Hill — 5/14/20
He is answering prayers in a huge way for you and your wonderful guys. Oh, Lesley, I am almost breathless reading your post! 16 MILLION!!!! Really?!!!!! 16 MILLION!!!! God is using your story for his Glory! Press On, Beautiful Friend!!!
Carol Churi — 5/14/20
Praise the Lord!
Mindy Stirling — 5/14/20
Our God has flexed His muscles for you Leslie!! I’m amazed at His goodness and love that’s being lavished on you and your family! I’m reminded of how many people are getting to see Jesus through your suffering: doctors, nurses, technicians, your donor and her family and her medical staff, etc…the list goes on and on. Your suffering is displaying Christ to the world! Praying for full healing and people, lots of people, to know Jesus because of this hardship! 🙏
Carrie Sanders — 5/14/20
16 is our families number too!
We live by this number. That’s why our race number is 416
Theresa Morgan — 5/14/20
God’s awesome work. Praying you continue to stay well. Y’all enjoy the upcoming birthday weekend. Sweet 16. 🙏🙏🙏😷😷
alan motter — 5/14/20
I was totally confident 😊😊🌞🌞
You, Marsh, and them boys deserve All the best that life has to offer.
Love and prayers 😊
Cancermamma 